Controlling Nellie or Nielson

I am not getting the whole I "want control over everything" attitude. What is that? I have been on this earth plenty enough time to know that many of us come from  homes that may knowingly ( or NOT)have  passed down ideologies that have not served us in our lifetime. I know that for many littlies who decided to grow up, those ideas and thoughts have transferred into "if I can control then I am safe." I have news regarding that. It is a myth. It is garbage. It is non existent.There is no such thing as control. It is like saying "diet chocolate" or  "I will make it short". The result of needing control of others are that those you control decide to give up or lose their enthusiasm all for your need to maintain. Is that worth it? Diminishing someones' light for your own security? I have seen it manifested in so many ways, the wife, the daughter, the friend, the sister, the husband, the father, the boyfriend, the in-laws. Need to control decisions, time, things, enthusiasm, conversation, environment, relationships. It okay with me to have an opinion. To offer it. YET, I think it would behoove (don't you love that word?) all of us to remember when we interject our opinions we think two things:
1. Is it coming from love?
2. Does it come with strings attached?
I lost a really important relationship because this person had decided that my life decisions, now mind you they forgot to ask me details, were not correct. When I attempted to clarify that and put our relationship on a better course, the need for control wedged right in between us. Relationship zero. Control 100. So I am still not sure who won that round? I felt like it was a loss.
So, today, no control over others. And maybe, just maybe, there is a diet chocolate worth trying. Go and Do.