Soul Sick...

Soul Sick……there is a great movie that uses this oh so profound and true line. A man, struggling to just get through the days, utters at one point of his beginnings of awareness “I am soul sick.” I have lived among those souls, being one of them from time to time, to know what it is truly to be Soul Sick.  It is that feeling that no matter what the sun is doing there are grey clouds engulfing the very essence which resides in a body. Love and joy may be scattered amongst the “sick” but does not penetrate more then a mere thin layer of the soul. The cure is allusive and not the same for any two people.

It is that feeling that the only comfort that can be sought is deep inside ones’ covers for hours or perhaps days or within a corn-dog smothered in a glob of  mayo or the very least an Ambien with a Redbull chaser. It brings the very contemplation of what a farewell letter might entail if the sun completely evades the earth that holds us down. It requires pajamas that are worn for more then 8 hours or sweat pants that have seen better days. It can be the need to devour books without thought to food or the need for food with a book for diversion. Soul Sickness often is accompanied with the random blood red chipped pol-nailish (that’s how we say it….don’t judge) and a hair do that looks as if a child was playing “Salon” in a typhoon. These things serve as a uniform for those who are afflicted with this ailment. This disability requires dark….dark rooms, dark stories, dark tales serving as almost a salve to the wound. The questions barrage the madness that invades during this time. What………what would my life be like? What have I done wrong? What if?  When the “whats” start the real insanity begins. 

And then, like all things, the Soul Sickness leaves. The scattered dishes are put in the dishwasher, the crumb ridden rug is vacuumed. The pj’s washed in hot water and the books are put neatly on the shelf. The covers are perfumed and fluffed to perfection. The pol-nailish is freshened and the Ambien is put away on the shelf safe for another day. The Sickness is gone………for now.

God is Good. So go and do and avoid at all cost the Soul Sickness.