30 Day Mister...
30 day Mister…..I am spurred on today to speak to those who are “looking for Mr. Right” or newly married to “My Mister”. I have noted in several unions of those in my circle that sometimes marriage is ……..shall we say difficult? Not mine, of course. (I say with tongue in cheek.) (LOL for the younger generation.) We glum onto the idea of picket fences, cruises, home furnishings. We find the boy that has the most “potential” of providing that. And then we marry him.
And then we marry him.
Bills start arriving, babies make entrances, neighbors buy cows that moo all night. The picket fence needs a painting. And then newlywed “Mister" starts having flaws. We brides, of course, have our own flaws but that is for another day!…... In the future!…... The far, far, away future. Back to Misters. What I have observed in the several hundred marriages that I have observed throughout my years as a human is that the cruises, fences, and furnishings don’t matter as much as we thought on that day we whispered the words “I Do”. The truth, it is the care we receive from our Misters that seem to determine our true happiness.
I read a very nice blog from a religious man who succumbed to the need for a wife. He speaks about their journey as a married couple and how he desired to separate his own egocentric self to be a better partner. He articulates that in all the studies, experiments, readings to become a better Prince that it came down to one thing and one thing only.
“The man who puts his wife above all else will be the happiest man on earth."
He wasn’t convinced. Surely work would take precedence. Or a good golf score. He knew if he succeeded at other things such as work, play, etc that would bring the real happiness. But he succumbed to the notion that he could take 30 days and put his wife above everything. Above work, friends, self need. The outcome surprised him. He partner was more supportive of him workwise. She embraced his obligations in the way of bolstering him up in words and deeds and support. The very things that Misters desire from their spouses. By creating an atmosphere were she certainly felt like a queen, he received his requirement of unfailing support. He was duly chastised and found the key to a happy life. And wife.
So the picket fence is a lie. It is what happens behind the fence that really matters to us. We want to be “cherished” above all else. We don’t want to be a roommate, a locker room buddy, a mother to our Misters. We want to be their Queen and treated in kind. We want doors opened for us and things carried into the house. We want thoughtful comments and flowers sent just because. We want mini adventures and Friday night hotel staycations. We want money allotted for those things that are important. We want to be listened too and not micro managed. We want to FEEL we are important instead of HOPING we are. We want to be in the forefront of Misters’ mind and treated so. We want to feel royalty status without asking/begging/praying for it.
So go put a copy of this under Mister side of the bed. And maybe he can do the 30 day experiment and get to avoid painting the picket fence all together. Go and do.
And then we marry him.
Bills start arriving, babies make entrances, neighbors buy cows that moo all night. The picket fence needs a painting. And then newlywed “Mister" starts having flaws. We brides, of course, have our own flaws but that is for another day!…... In the future!…... The far, far, away future. Back to Misters. What I have observed in the several hundred marriages that I have observed throughout my years as a human is that the cruises, fences, and furnishings don’t matter as much as we thought on that day we whispered the words “I Do”. The truth, it is the care we receive from our Misters that seem to determine our true happiness.
I read a very nice blog from a religious man who succumbed to the need for a wife. He speaks about their journey as a married couple and how he desired to separate his own egocentric self to be a better partner. He articulates that in all the studies, experiments, readings to become a better Prince that it came down to one thing and one thing only.
“The man who puts his wife above all else will be the happiest man on earth."
He wasn’t convinced. Surely work would take precedence. Or a good golf score. He knew if he succeeded at other things such as work, play, etc that would bring the real happiness. But he succumbed to the notion that he could take 30 days and put his wife above everything. Above work, friends, self need. The outcome surprised him. He partner was more supportive of him workwise. She embraced his obligations in the way of bolstering him up in words and deeds and support. The very things that Misters desire from their spouses. By creating an atmosphere were she certainly felt like a queen, he received his requirement of unfailing support. He was duly chastised and found the key to a happy life. And wife.
So the picket fence is a lie. It is what happens behind the fence that really matters to us. We want to be “cherished” above all else. We don’t want to be a roommate, a locker room buddy, a mother to our Misters. We want to be their Queen and treated in kind. We want doors opened for us and things carried into the house. We want thoughtful comments and flowers sent just because. We want mini adventures and Friday night hotel staycations. We want money allotted for those things that are important. We want to be listened too and not micro managed. We want to FEEL we are important instead of HOPING we are. We want to be in the forefront of Misters’ mind and treated so. We want to feel royalty status without asking/begging/praying for it.
So go put a copy of this under Mister side of the bed. And maybe he can do the 30 day experiment and get to avoid painting the picket fence all together. Go and do.
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