Time gone by
Time has almost raced by. My darling eldest posted pics of her and her sweet sister when they just littlies and then a current picture. I thought I had all the time in the world with them back then. Sometimes It seemed that I had too much time.
But I didn't.
I miss those days when we were just "us". Missing those "days" occur so sporadically and out of the blue. I find myself missing "them" often when it is cloudy and rainy and I have a pot of chili going and sweet music wafting throughout the house, I remember when it was just us. The six of us. All together. Life was a beautiful time. I loved every minute of it. I didn't know then that my heart was capable of containing so much love for those who came to us as our children. Watching them watch Arthur, playing Barbies or making brightly colored Kool-aid with their daddy, I thought they would never grow up. I thought I had time. I thought that there were so many things I needed to be doing back then or that I was missing out on. I thought I should be a better excerciser and I should be bringing in more money. I should be a better religious person regarding my time and I should spend time with friends. But for the most part I put all those things aside and was "just there". The times I didn't do that, I hated my life. I hated what I missed out on, what I was too tired to see or do and I hated it. Then I would get myself back in line and would rediscover that there was no greater joy I could have then being my childrens mama.
Go and do and you won't regret it....you will only regret when you don't!
But I didn't.
I miss those days when we were just "us". Missing those "days" occur so sporadically and out of the blue. I find myself missing "them" often when it is cloudy and rainy and I have a pot of chili going and sweet music wafting throughout the house, I remember when it was just us. The six of us. All together. Life was a beautiful time. I loved every minute of it. I didn't know then that my heart was capable of containing so much love for those who came to us as our children. Watching them watch Arthur, playing Barbies or making brightly colored Kool-aid with their daddy, I thought they would never grow up. I thought I had time. I thought that there were so many things I needed to be doing back then or that I was missing out on. I thought I should be a better excerciser and I should be bringing in more money. I should be a better religious person regarding my time and I should spend time with friends. But for the most part I put all those things aside and was "just there". The times I didn't do that, I hated my life. I hated what I missed out on, what I was too tired to see or do and I hated it. Then I would get myself back in line and would rediscover that there was no greater joy I could have then being my childrens mama.
Go and do and you won't regret it....you will only regret when you don't!
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